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Thursday, July 8, 2010

How is that working for you?

Rejection. Yuck. Picked last for the team, or not picked at all. Friends that have faded away as fascades melt and real-life unfolds. Voted off the island during a corporate re-structure.

Often , it is the fear of rejection that blocks me from revealing the truth of what is going on inside. It's an old tape... "If you share the truth, you will be rejected and hurt."

So, the other night I was having dinner with an out-of-town friend and shared some of what was going on in my life. He asked... "So, how is that working for you in your work?" To which I responded... "It hasn't affected it at all."

"Really?" he asked. "I would have thought your work might have gotten better. Stronger. Deeper."

And I smiled.

"You went to rejection didn't you? You thought what I asked was 'Have you been rejected?' in your work."

He was right. I went to focusing on the bad thing that might have happened, instead of the good things that have happened. Because, in truth, these last few months have produced better, stronger, and deeper work for me.

It's a familiar struggle... will I focus on the bad thing that might happen if I step out, speak my truth, expose a vulnerability... or will I focus on the good thing. Fear or appreciation.

I choose appreciation. And you?