At points I begin to feel lonely and sink. Lots of scripts play in my head... "Alone at 56? Loser!" "Without chaos at home there is no life!" "You drive people away!" And, it's a good opportunity to explore if the opposites might be as true or truer than the voices of lonely despair!
"Alone at 56. Freedom to explore your own wants."
"Without chaos at home, there is sanctuary and grounding."
"You attract like-wired people."
So, I can ride the roller coaster down into the despair of inner chaos, and I can ride it back up into a place of acceptance and appreciation. It's a choice.